poverty pains
You don’t realize what’s not normal when it’s all you’ve ever known.
Growing up poor meant I didn’t question the cigarette smoke that hung in the air, the cavities I always had, or why I constantly felt sick. I didn’t know fresh air could exist inside a home. I didn’t know brushing your teeth was something people did year-round—not just during the school year. I didn’t know I was allergic to the very air I breathed daily.
Pain was normal. When I cut my thumb to the bone, I was handed electrical tape instead of being taken to the doctor. When my appendix ruptured at age eight, no one believed me until it nearly killed me.
We didn’t go to the doctor unless we were dying. And sometimes, not even then.
This wasn’t just my story—it was our story. The story of families trying to survive, not knowing they were suffering. What we endured felt normal. But normal doesn’t mean right.
These memories still follow me. But now, I use them to light the way for others.
If this resonates with you, stick around. There's more to come
In Jesus’ name,
Brother’s Keeper
Every family journey is woven with moments of joy and trials that test our faith and compassion. As brothers, we’re called not only to share laughter and dreams but to carry one another through life’s darkest valleys, following the example of Christ’s sacrificial love. In the stories below—of a newborn’s first giggle and a midnight rescue—you’ll see how small acts of service and steadfast faith can light the way through even the hardest seasons. We are, in every sense, our brother’s keeper.
Welcoming New Life
When my baby brother came to live with us at about six months old, his tiny hands and joyful coos brought new life into our home.
Night after night, I stayed up with Mamaw, feeding him, changing diapers, and rocking him to sleep.
I didn’t do it because I had to. I did it because I loved him—and because sometimes, love means showing up when no one else can.
A Midnight Test of Faith
One night, my older brother collapsed after using synthetic drugs. At sixteen, I found myself dragging him—twenty years old and unable to walk—through the darkness back to our room.
Every step was a struggle. My arms burned, my legs shook, but I didn’t stop.
I didn’t know much about fatherhood, but I knew what it meant to be a brother. And in that moment, that was enough.
Lessons from Brotherhood
Presence Matters: You don’t have to have all the answers. Sometimes just being there makes the biggest difference.
Love is Active: Real love moves. It feeds, it lifts, it carries.
Faith Gives Strength: When the weight feels too heavy, God gives just enough grace to keep going.
Takeaway:
True brotherhood is about more than shared blood—it’s about shared burdens. Whether we’re holding a baby bottle at 2 a.m. or carrying someone through a crisis, we reflect the heart of Christ when we choose love, sacrifice, and faithfulness. That’s what being your brother’s keeper is all about.
You can find the full versions of these stories, and many more like them, in my upcoming book Me and Poverty—it’s a journey of hardship, hope, and the grace that carried me through.
In Jesus’ name,
Mentor Moments: Three Questions That Unlock a Young Person’s Potential
Every great journey begins with a single question.
When I first sat across from a mentor years ago, he didn’t hand me a checklist—he asked, “What matters most to you today?” That simple question changed everything. Over the years, I’ve refined three go‑to questions that cut through noise, build trust, and invite action.
1. “What’s one small win you’ve had lately?”
Shifting the focus to recent victories—even tiny ones—builds confidence. When a student realizes they’ve already succeeded at something, no matter how small, momentum grows. Celebrate it with them, ask about the feelings it stirred, and watch them lean into the next challenge.
2. “If you could step into your best possible future for one hour, what would you be doing?”
This “future‑vision” question sparks imagination and purpose. Youth who feel stuck often haven’t allowed themselves to dream. By painting a vivid hour in their day‑in‑the‑life-of‑success, you give them permission to plan actionable steps—whether that’s drafting a first resume, finding a mentor, or mapping out daily habits.
3. “Who’s already cheering you on, and how can I help amplify that?”
No one achieves lasting change alone. This question uncovers their support network and highlights gaps. It also signals your commitment to collaboration—not a lecture. When you connect them with a teacher, coach, or community resource, you transform encouragement into concrete opportunity.
These three Mentor Moments have been the cornerstone of my work—from one‑on‑one coaching sessions to 5‑minute MAP videos. Try them at your next meeting and see how a few intentional queries can turn hesitation into hope, confusion into clarity, and potential into progress.
Ready to sharpen your mentoring toolkit? Hit reply and let’s explore how we can empower more young people—one question at a time.
In Jesus’ name,
A house, but not a home
What makes a house feel like home?
When my siblings and I arrived at my grandparents’ small, drafty house, it provided shelter but very little else. My grandfather—hunched over a worn spiral notebook—juggled a tiny disability check and food stamps, while my grandmother stretched every scrap of ingredients into dinners that tasted like miracles. Some nights we ate plain white bread soaked in thin gravy, and we called it a feast simply because it filled us.
My grandfather found solace gathering wild herbs to sell, a quiet work that let him escape the chaos of suddenly raising five boys he hadn’t planned for. Yet beneath his sturdy frame lay years of unspoken trauma—abuse that had shaped his discipline and the way he saw the world. Tension crackled at home: arguments with my older brother would erupt, sometimes ending with doors slammed shut, sometimes with fists. I remember one night he pressed a broomstick against my brother’s throat in a desperate mix of rage and fear. Even then, my brother wouldn’t cry out. It wouldn’t have mattered if he did.
And yet, in the midst of that struggle, there were sparks of joy. Mamaw taught us that love doesn’t always come from comfort, but from creativity and perseverance. She turned canned biscuits into powdered-sugar doughnuts and cornbread into a “poor‑man’s dessert” that tasted like heaven. I still recall the memory of us, barefoot in the yard, plucking chickens together—an unpleasant task that ended in warmth around the dinner table.
As I grew older, I felt the sting of shame—hand‑me‑downs that never quite fit, classmates lacing up new shoes while mine wore thin. But with each pang of embarrassment, I also learned resilience. My grandmother didn’t know about savings accounts or financial planning, but she modeled endurance, faithfulness, and unconditional love.
Looking back now, I see that our true refuge wasn’t those creaking floorboards or patched‑up walls. It was a promise whispered in Scripture: “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Jesus Christ became our true shelter, turning a house into a home where brokenness could meet healing. His grace reminded me that no matter how heavy our burdens, He carries us through the darkest nights and makes our spirits soar.
Today, I share this story not to dwell on the pain of the past, but to celebrate the hope we found in Him. If you’re carrying weariness in your heart, remember: Christ’s love is the greatest home we could ever know—one that endures forever.
In Jesus’ name,
Perfect Parents: A Glimpse into the Realities of Poverty
Growing up in rural Appalachia during the 1990s and 2000s taught me early on that there are no perfect parents—only imperfect souls trying to survive. My mother, coming from a lineage where education was secondary and survival took precedence, managed to push past the limitations of her environment by reaching the tenth grade. Yet, the challenges she faced went far beyond the classroom.
Diagnosed with schizophrenia at a young age, my mother’s life was an ongoing battle against mental illness, compounded by the grip of drugs and alcohol. With no real support system, her struggles inevitably affected every facet of our lives. As a teenager, I witnessed firsthand the profound impact of poverty—a world where every loss was magnified, and every mistake felt like a lifelong sentence.
One summer day, a rare family outing for school shopping became a microcosm of our reality. Determined to prove her capability, my mother had carefully saved her monthly SSI checks for this special trip. Keep in mind there were six of us boys so we did not have a lot of funds available. I, finding solace in the idea of self-improvement through weightlifting, splurged a good amount of my budget on a pair of gloves—a small, tangible symbol of my desire for strength and control over a life marked by instability.
However, as I sat in the car afterward, I discovered that one glove was missing. In that moment, the loss wasn’t just about an inanimate object; it was a stark reminder of the unforgiving nature of poverty, where every slip-up leaves an indelible mark on your sense of worth. When you grow up in poverty, loss is never just loss. It carries a weight beyond the thing itself. It reminds you of what little you have, of how few chances you get. There is no room for carelessness, no space for mistakes. One wrong move, one moment of not paying attention, and something is gone forever. My mind immediately went to the worst places.
Of course this happened to me. It wouldn’t have happened to anyone else.
Of course I wasted my money. I should have known better than to buy something I actually wanted.
I didn’t deserve nice things.
Poverty teaches you to see the world in extremes. It is either all or nothing, success or failure, win or lose. There is no in-between, no second chances, no way to fix what is broken. You either get it right the first time, or you are left with nothing.
Yet, amid the despair, an unexpected act of kindness emerged. My mother’s boyfriend, one of mine and my brothers’ four fathers, calmly offered, “I’ll go back inside and get you another pair.” This simple gesture, in a life where nothing is ever easily replaced, resonated deeply with me. It was a fleeting but profound reminder that compassion can sometimes break through even the harshest realities.
While perfect parents may be a myth, these small moments of care and unexpected kindness can illuminate the darkest paths, offering a glimmer of hope and a reminder that even in a world of scarcity, humanity endures.
In Jesus’ name,
Faith, Fatherhood, and Overcoming the Past
My son just turned four. It’s a fun, exhausting, and sometimes frustrating age—one where every day is an adventure, full of questions, laughter, and moments that test your patience. But more than anything, it’s an age where children need their parents the most. That fact hits me hard because I was four years old—the same age my son is now—when my parents left me to be raised by my grandparents.
I can’t remember the exact moment they walked away, but I have lived with the reality of it my entire life. My father chose not to stay. My mother couldn’t. They were caught in their own struggles, weighed down by poverty, addiction, and brokenness. And so, at four years old, I was left behind—placed in the care of my grandparents, who already had their own battles to fight. They loved me, and they did the best they could with what little they had. But no matter how much love they poured into me, there was always something missing.
Now, as a father, I cannot fathom walking away from my son. He is at an age where he needs me for everything—from tying his shoes to helping him navigate big emotions. He needs reassurance that he is loved, that he is safe, and that his parents will always be there for him. And I refuse to let him experience even a fraction of the abandonment I did.
I thank God every day that my life is different now. My wife and I do okay financially, and we no longer live in the poverty that defined my childhood. But money isn’t what makes the difference for my son—it’s presence. It’s being there. It’s showing up for him in ways my parents never did for me.
God’s design for family is intentional. Parents are meant to raise their children, to guide them, to love them, and to set them on the right path. While I am forever grateful for the sacrifices my grandparents made, I know that a child thrives best when they are nurtured by the parents God gave them. The Bible tells us to “train up a child in the way he should go” (Proverbs 22:6), and that training starts with simply being there—day in and day out, in both the mundane and the extraordinary moments of life.
This is what Me and Poverty is all about. It’s not just about the financial struggles I escaped, but the deeper poverty of being without the love and support of my parents. It’s about breaking generational cycles and ensuring that my son—and every child—has the chance to grow up with the security, love, and guidance they deserve.
As I celebrate my son’s fourth birthday, I do so with the overwhelming gratitude that I get to be his father. That I get to be present. That I get to give him what I never had. And I pray that every child, no matter their circumstances, will have someone in their life who refuses to walk away.
In Jesus’ name,
BE THE SOMEONE
Too often, we watch from the sidelines as people around us struggle—waiting for someone else to step in, waiting for a sign, or simply remaining passive. Today, I invite you to change that. Instead of accepting a low ceiling for the people within your circle of influence, why not become the catalyst for change?
The Call to Action
Imagine the overworked teacher who’s seen countless students slip through the cracks, or the coach, pastor, public figure, or entrepreneur who once battled their own struggles to succeed. Many of us have experienced the difference that genuine investment and belief can make in a young person’s life. If you’ve ever felt that tug to do more—whether you’re a mentor or someone who has “made it out” and remembers the struggle—this message is for you.
Every day is an opportunity to make an impact. Across the globe, countless children, teens, and young adults thirst for a chance to shine. They are like undiscovered oil wells or rough diamonds needing a little polish. By recognizing their potential and offering your guidance, you can help unlock the greatness within them.
The Power of a Single Encounter
I’m reminded of a moment from my own youth. I was a shy teenager, starting to build my relationship with Jesus and searching for a deeper meaning in life. At a revival service, while singing quietly in the middle of a church, an elderly woman turned to me and said, “You have just the best voice.” Although I hesitated to step forward, her words didn’t stop there. With a gentle conviction, she added, “God has great plans for you, young man. I’m not sure what exactly, but you were made for great things.”
In that brief encounter, she ignited a spark in me—a spark that has driven me to chase opportunities and break free from the constraints of poverty. Even though we never exchanged names, her encouragement left a mark that has defined my journey. That moment was not about grand gestures or formal mentorship; it was about one person choosing to invest in another. She was the “someone.”
Investing in Others
You don’t have to be a mentor in the traditional sense to make a difference. It’s about embracing a mindset—a commitment to live a life that truly matters by lifting others along the way. Whether you’re teaching, coaching, or simply sharing your experiences, consider these thoughts:
• See Beyond Limitations: Recognize the untapped potential in every person. Look past the negatives and focus on what could shine with the right support.
• Offer Genuine Encouragement: Sometimes, a few kind words can change the course of someone’s life. Believe in their capacity to grow and excel.
• Be Present: True impact comes from being there—listening, guiding, and sometimes just sharing a moment of understanding.
Conclusion: Embrace Your Role
Every interaction holds the possibility of transforming a life. The story of that elderly woman reminds us that even a single encounter can inspire a lifelong commitment to excellence. Don’t wait for someone else to make the first move. Instead, choose to be the someone who steps forward, who believes, and who invests in the future of others.
Be bold, be courageous, and above all, be the someone who makes a difference.
Thank you for reading this edition of the Me and Poverty blog. I hope it inspires you to look around, see the potential in those you encounter, and act with compassion and conviction. Let’s redefine what it means to live a life that matters—one person at a time.
In Jesus’ name,
Floods to Families: Restoring Dignity After Crisis
devastation
The recent floods battered our community, leaving many families—our neighbors, friends, and loved ones—with little more than memories of what once was. Amidst the devastation, hope and compassion continue to shine through the smallest yet most powerful acts of kindness.
Dignity
While volunteering this week, I met a man whose home had been utterly devastated. With six family members under one roof, he had lost nearly everything. When I mentioned that we had fresh, clean undergarments available, his face lit up like a Christmas tree. In that simple moment, the joy of being able to offer his wife a clean bra restored a fragment of dignity during a time of utter loss.
In another encounter, I witnessed a man—who had been wading through flood water to salvage what he could—simply ask for dry socks. I watched him sit on the cold ground and sigh with relief as he peeled off his wet socks to reveal pruney feet. With quiet gratitude, he carefully replaced his soaked socks with fresh, dry ones. These moments remind us that even the most minor items can make an enormous difference for families struggling to recover from unimaginable hardship.
Scripture inspires us to act with love and unity. Hebrews 10:24 (KJV) encourages us,
“And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works.”
This verse calls us to serve with genuine care, not for recognition but to extend love to those who need it most.
Today, many families are not only grappling with the immediate aftermath of the floods but also facing long-term challenges—such as the inability to move out of the flood plains or afford flood insurance. Let us look past the noise of who “deserves” our help and focus on restoring dignity through genuine service and compassion. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, builds a foundation for a brighter future for all our families.
Want to donate your time or financially?
Anyone looking to donate financially can do so here! Or text “GIVE” to (606) 220-2627.
Looking to get your hands dirty and able to physically help clean homes? Click here!
Onward together,
Top 5 Lessons I Learned While Overcoming Adversity
In my journey from poverty to a place of hope and growth, I encountered challenges that reshaped my life. My book, Me and Poverty, captures these struggles, and today I want to share five powerful lessons I learned along the way.
1. Resilience is Built Through Struggle
Adversity can feel overwhelming, but every setback taught me to rise again. I discovered that resilience isn’t about avoiding hardship—it’s about confronting it head-on and using each failure as a stepping stone toward success. Every difficult moment strengthened my resolve to keep moving forward.
2. Faith Lights the Darkest Paths
During my bleakest times, faith was my guiding star. Believing in a higher purpose provided comfort and clarity when I needed it most. This unwavering faith helped me navigate uncertainty and reminded me that every challenge was part of a larger, meaningful plan.
3. Small Wins Matter
When life seems insurmountable, celebrating small victories can make all the difference. Whether it was overcoming a daily obstacle or seizing a new opportunity, these incremental wins built the momentum for lasting change.
4. Community is Essential
I learned that overcoming adversity is not a solitary journey. Reaching out for support from friends, mentors, and community members provided both practical help and emotional strength. Sharing our burdens lightens the load and opens doors to unexpected opportunities.
5. Your Story Can Inspire Others
Lastly, I realized that sharing my struggles and triumphs has the power to inspire. By telling my story, I hope to empower others facing similar hardships, proving that even the darkest moments can lead to profound transformation.
If my journey resonates with you, I invite you to be part of this transformative experience. Preorder Me and Poverty now on Kickstarter using this link before the preorder window ends.
What is kickstarter, and why am i using it?
I’ve had quite a few people mention they wanted to support my book but aren’t too familiar with Kickstarter. To be honest, before last year, I wasn’t either. Kickstarter is a crowdfunding platform where people like you can support creative projects—everything from books to films to innovative products. It’s not just about funding; it’s about building a community. By backing a project, you become part of the journey, from creation to completion.
why Kickstarter?
Well, I want Me and Poverty to be more than just a book. I want it to be a mission—something we accomplish together. When you back this project, you’re not just helping me publish a book; you’re helping inspire others to invest in at-risk youth and help them escape poverty.
benefits to you
Kickstarter gives you some fantastic benefits, too. First, you’ll get early access to the book before it’s available anywhere else. Second, it creates a direct connection between you and me. You’ll get updates, behind-the-scenes looks, and a chance to be part of the creative process. You even have the option to get an author-signed copy with your or a loved one’s name in it as a supporter, which will not be offered in stores!
Another great perk? By backing the project, you’ll get the book at a lower price than it will retail for later. Most importantly, you’ll know that your support is part of a larger mission to help others escape the cycle of poverty I grew up in.
publishing costs
Now let’s talk about the costs. Publishing a book isn’t cheap. I’ve written a great manuscript, but editing, design, and marketing all come at a price. Platforms like Amazon don’t cover those expenses, and even if they did, they also take over 40% of every sale plus the cost of printing. With Kickstarter, I can ensure those funds go toward creating the best possible book while keeping the mission at the forefront. I look forward to the day that this book is published and I can donate copies to schools for teachers and coaches to enjoy.
Final thoughts
This book isn’t just my story—it’s a roadmap for others who are navigating their way out of poverty. By supporting this project, you’re helping spread a message of hope and empowerment to those who need it most. Together, we can make a difference.
So, if you believe in this mission and want to be part of something bigger, I’d love for you to check out the Kickstarter campaign. Let’s make Me and Poverty a reality—together. The link is right here: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/meandpoverty/me-and-poverty
Why me and poverty?
I wanted to shine a light on the struggles of poverty while offering hope and inspiration to those facing it. Growing up in poverty taught me hard lessons about resilience, faith, and the importance of others stepping in to help when the odds seem insurmountable. When I started writing Me and Poverty, I wasn’t just telling my story—I was on a mission.
But this book isn’t just about me. It’s about everyone who feels stuck in a cycle they didn’t create, unsure how to break free. It’s about kids who grow up without the resources, support, or belief that they can achieve something greater. It’s for those who need a roadmap, a little encouragement, and a lot of grace to navigate their way out of their circumstances.
As someone who experienced homelessness and abandonment, I know firsthand how poverty tries to define you. But I also know that it doesn’t have to have the final word. Through faith in God, the kindness of mentors, and a determination to change my future, I was able to rewrite my story. Now, I want to show others that they can do the same.
I wrote Me and Poverty because I believe every story matters—especially the ones that show transformation is possible. By sharing my journey, I hope to inspire adults, especially those working with at-risk youth, to invest in the next generation. Teachers, coaches, parents, pastors—anyone who supports young people—can make a profound difference in helping them escape poverty and create a brighter future.
This book is my way of giving back. It’s a thank-you to the people who invested in me and a call to action for others to do the same. It’s also a testimony of how God’s love and grace can change a life, even when hope seems out of reach.
Me and Poverty isn’t just a memoir—it’s a roadmap for breaking free. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by your circumstances or wondered how you can help someone else find their way, this book is for you. My prayer is that it inspires readers to believe that change is possible and reminds them that they’re never alone in their journey.
This is more than a story—it’s an invitation to join me in breaking the chains of poverty, one life at a time. Thank you for being part of this mission. Let’s make an impact together.
Onward Together,
The 14 Books that shaped my year (including one you haven’t read yet!)
It all begins with an idea.
I wasn’t always a big reader, but mentors in my life showed me the truth in Harry S. Truman’s statement: “Not all readers are leaders, but all leaders are readers.” Because of that, I’ve had some catching up to do—diving into books that many people may already know and love. This year, I read 14 incredible titles that taught me lessons, strengthened my faith, and inspired growth.
Here’s what I read this year:
• Your City is Sick by Jeff Siegler
• Glue by Anh Dao Pham
• Choose Your Enemies Wisely by Patrick Bet-David
• The Art of War by Sun Tzu
• Agency: The Four Point Plan (F.R.E.E.) by Ian V. Rowe
• How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
• Atomic Habits by James Clear
• The Mountain is You by Brianna Wiest
• When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett
• Hillbilly Elegy by J.D. Vance
• Bridges Out of Poverty by Philip DeVol
• The 5 AM Club by Robin Sharma
• Leadership NOT by the Book by David Green
• Me and Poverty by Yours Truly
Which one is my top choice for the year? That’s tough. Your City is Sick taught me that if the people in their town aren’t proud of where they live and care enough to take care of it, then why should any potential new people care to move there? Choose Your Enemies Wisely teaches the importance of emotional intelligence and strategically picking your adversaries so they fuel your growth. Ian Rowe’s book Agency teaches us that if you are born into poverty but follow a particular success sequence, you have a 96% chance of escaping poverty! I have to say it was undoubtedly my #1 for the year…until I read Leadership NOT by the Book. The owner of Hobby Lobby, which just so happens to be my wife’s favorite place on earth, shares his life experiences in such a way that challenges most of what I learned while obtaining my MBA. I gained a lot of respect not only for Mr. Green but also for his organization. Some of my biggest takeaways from his book are as follows:
“We should earn more to give more.”
“Look at least 150 years down the road.”
“Be obedient to God.”
“Be humble.”
“Find your one calling and ask God to anoint it.”
“Chase it with all your might.”
“Stay in the weeds - for the sake of yourself and the business.”
The philosophy of “Close Counts”.
Lastly, yes, I am a little biased. His perspective on the story of Joseph in the bible.
This year wasn’t just about reading great books—it was also about writing one. Me and Poverty has been a labor of love, and I can’t wait for it to hit shelves this coming year. It’s a roadmap to escaping poverty, filled with stories from my own journey and the people who invested in me along the way. If you’re planning your 2025 reading list, I hope you’ll save a spot for it!
What books shaped your year? Let me know in the comments—I’m always looking for more inspiration!
Onward Together,